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Miranda, Raven – part 5


From: WSB3ATTYCA
Subject: Rainbow Two (was Strainbow)
Date: August 25, 1998
Newsgroups: alt.gathering.rainbow

Now the second set of people I had to deal with, the rank and file high holies; yes: they and their ilk are riddled with bias and prejudice, denial and fear, morals and other phobias. The middle class is the middle class in Babylon or rainbow. They believe in freedom/anarchy just as soon as everyone understands right and wrong the way they know it to be so. The main paradigm is ye olde cosmic crime and punishment mental template that is, in new age/hippy/ rainbow parlance, Calvinism posited (quite wrongly) as the concept of karma. (Karma has nothing to do with credits and debits, which is essental to Calvinism and Christianity generally. This is a Western mangling of karma. This goes back to St. Paul’s addresses to the merchantile class in Corinth. The profit metaphor.) The basic attitude is of people deserving what happens to them. When I spoke of having not enough to eat or drink, one of these mudcake creatures started citing the heroes in history who had fasted for great causes. So I suppose I am unequal to the great opportunities of underhydration and undernourishment. When I rejected a sandwhich made with mayonaise from a partially used jar that had sat in the sun for five days, this same paragon ate it with great slurpingly audible gusto to indicate, I surmise, what an inadequate, nutty, scaredy cat I am, incapable of purifying impure food by virtue of my lack of virtue. These sad, fearful dwellers in denial and ambivalence are the children of the bodhisatva. Compassion rolls out of my bones for these. In a nut shell, these folks think matter is material.

But thirdly: The rainbow in MY heart, the rainbow I am, the rainbow sisters and rainbow brothers I cleave to and am in my essence intermingled I and I with are in fact walkers of the talk, talkers of the walk. Some I know, others I know but have not met in this incarnation. Of these there are incalculably many in the Rainbow Family of Living Light. These folks, as I, would put a fire out in as brief and uncomplicated a time-space line as would please a yogic fire chief. And they would minister to and see after and follow through with the person or people who were affected by the fire/smoke/loss of property/trauma. They would carry food, water, medicine to the ill. And they would not even think to worry cause and effect except in the area of helping in car repair--which is the only arena of Newtonian concern in the whole story.(Sic: Newtonian=cause and effect. The debits and credits of ordinary mechanics. Elsewhere in quantumworld, karmaworld, Loveworld, heartworld “everything arises at once”, to quote Alan Watts.) And these folks would do all this whether on the land or on Columbus Circle in Manhattan. At the same time, this caveat: They--I--might regress and revert in a fear spiral and start judging and ascribing blame for a moment or six months. But wisdom and love floods healingly in and this excellence is resumed as above described.

    Miranda, Raven [more anon]


From: WSB3ATTYCA
Subject: A Rainbow for Yellowhand (was Strainbow)
Date: August 25, 1998

Yellowhand wrote:
> It is unfortunate these lowly few you have encountered. The rainbow, as is life, is what you make of it.

Miranda, Raven replies: Totally. Totally. A big secret is that in one’s creating, though, others will tell you you are wrong or bad to be creating; or that making life anew can’t be done, and, again, that to do so is bad. So the awakeness is to watch this and not take that toxen in. If you simply say: “I need water, food, and meds”, and someone calls you demanding, tells you that you don’t need these essentials, tells you that you don’t deserve these things because you don’t already have them, and/or tells you shouldn’t need help getting these things if God really loved you, keeping clear is the job at hand. But when you need water, food and meds, staying clear is already taxed due to innate, organic, complicated and ubiquitous chemical deprivations and compensations in play due to those very deprivations.

Yellowhand wrote:
> During your time of despair did you give in to the Babylon ways or have you been tolerant, and forgiving, and did you make the rainbow land wherever you were?

Miranda, Raven replies: I was a jerk several times, but I was very creative about it. One morning at the kitchen I was scrounging for coffee dregs and a nosh of some sort and some pretentious self appointed higher than holy high holy was parley vouzing with a local jesus freak. And this hh was telling the local that he was bringing jesus single handedly to the whole darn rainbow and he was turning the rainbow around toward the lord he could just feel it and see it. Then the local said he was hearing an awful lot of profanity. The hh said, “Oh that’s A camp.” (They were hearing one nuclear attack siren-voiced A camper whose job in life, as he sees it, is to yell, Fuck You several hundred times per diem. I spoke up and said, “Yeah this whole fucking place was drunk on its ass last night!” The hh said to the local, speaking past me as if I were a three year old, “You see?” The local got up and split. But the fact remained. That high holy and the others were so drunk the night before, a couple of them were actually sitting in the mud. A camp was drunk on its ass too. I on the other hand was working away putting the new manifold on my truck... Then, in some tiny s. cal town, I poured water in the trough under the bullet proof glass in a check cashing place where I was picking up a moneygram from Warner for gas on my 41st day on the road. The guy behind the glass was incredibly rude and had kept me in that building that was literally 130 degrees for twenty five minutes while he fumbled around and engaged in unnecessary activity other than waiting on me. His booth was air conditioned. When I confronted him rationally about the delays after I had license and cash in hand, he screamed at me obscenely. Without premeditation I saw my hand dump the contents of my drinking water in the tray where money and checks etc are passed. I’m not proud of this. It doesn’t further peace or understanding. But! It relieved a LOT OF PRESSURE in me, and was harmless, really, but far more in the vein of revenge than I care to foray.

But, yes. Other than these two places, I was tolerant and forgiving at the same time I held my ground. And yes. The whole globe I live on is rainbow land. Is the land. Is sacred! (Sweet, sweet mother!) And every contact with another person is a contact with the god spark, however conscious or unconscious you or they may be. And yes by focusing on the light, the godhood in the Other, krishna consciousness is increased in the world. (Krishna, krishna!) One of the problems at present in the world/rainbow is that reiterated requests are seen as complaints, heard as recriminations, when in fact, like when fundamental needs are, of course, by definition, ungoing, the request is restated after an interval. So much of what I went through hinged on people’s predispositions to be defensive and to stereotype. Conscious of this going in, I did my darndest to work with it with out handing out the same ignorance in return.

And, no, yellowhand, my beautiful brother, I was never in despair. It was always my mountain I was on. I was always my own deliverence, just as I had delivered myself there. Furthermore, whatever lack of water or the milk of human kindness I suffered, I had my beautiful gypsy house to retire to! Though I was neglected by people whose help I very much needed, I also was sweetly housed thanks to my own great concerted efforts at self-reliance! How could I be in my house long and believe all that rhetoric about how bad/inadequate I was to need help?

Yellowhand wrote:
> It looks to me that this may be an excellent time for you to be the teacher rather than the victim.

Miranda, Raven replies: Oh! But don’t you know! I never felt a victim, per se, except situationally, and then still only on a limited basis. I worked always at remembering that that was happening in the temporal plane only. On the infinite plain, eternal plain I was on a great mountain fasting and meditating. I was in the woods listening to the heart beat of aspens. I was bowing before a husband and wife, a king and queen couple of old aspens. I was dialogueing with thunderstorms. I was listening to the raindrops play a scale falling at different tone lengths on the curved gypsy house roof. I was playing guitar, writing songs, writing poems, making notes about the philosophical and actual strain between the individual and the group. I gathered mini lodge poles for the tipi I made for children in Tucsan. I bonded deeply with a couple of A campers. To the point of having the beating heart of one of them in my hands on an astral plane, I suppose. (Did some healing there!) They got the cleanup truck the day before I left and took me down to the actual site and showed me where everything had been. (This going down to the site from near front gate was a first in 15 days of being there. I just can’t get around well...) I could see the whole gathering! I could see you all on the Land! I could hear it, smell it, taste it! I prayed over it. Took on the energy. It was just LOVE! Wow! The DRUMS! The colors! The movement! The children! Beautiful. All that prayer and love and hope is still all there. It is now a dream that land dreams of us....the rainbow dream. I was very happy. These two guys were so happy to show me. The three of us grinned all the way. It was like a ghost date. A ghost dance. We shared a pipe. I respected the four winds. Yeah I did a lot of teaching. At cleanup. On the road. Regardless of my deprivations, I had an amazing time, learning tremendous amounts of things. The aspens are tatooed on the insides of my bones now. I saw a foot long lizard come out of the huge A camp camp fire one night, long long after any log he might have been in was put on the blaze. Then it walked back in through flames and over dozens of egg-sized coals, then seizured out again. I now believe that this was a sign of what was going to happen to Tony. This was one of many fiery omens and signs I saw up on that land. An apache poet was there. He all but puked, this unholy stuff with the reptile so repulsed him. I saw it was a thing of no good news...

I learned three words of Apache. Yes. (Ah!) No. (Dah.) Heart. (Gee.) I saw herds of elk and deer in the meadow up there. Taught a very silly council circle the crazy horse method of council: “You all council. I’m going elk hunting. Come and tell me what council decides. Then I will do what I will do.”

Yellowhand wrote:
> You don’t sound like a quitter to me.

Miranda, Raven says: Nay, a quitter I am not, by the goddess’ bequest. I’ll divulge this though: Because of oxygen deprivation to the brain in conjunction with the hatred heaped upon me at the gate when my truck caught fire, I will confess I thought of the desirousness of death a lot in that first night. I work very, very hard to care for my own needs, to compensate for my own disabilities by using my brains and labor so as to minimize being a burden to others while at the same time keeping myself comfortable and cared for so as to do service for others utilizing my many skills. That night after all that unmitigated and quite potent abuse, I felt the great horror of dependency upon cruel and stupid people. All my years of work on the truck and gypsy house, the fact that I had journeyed off with plenty of supplies and money (barring the breakdowns and consequent prolonging of my days on the road) had done nothing to prevent what had occurred. WB Yeats has this line of poetry: “This is no country for old men...” That’s how I thought of the rainbow all that night: “This is no country for old women...” I just WOULD rather be dead than live in a world dominated by such people--(really I mean such “sickness/attitude” not people. Love the people; deplore and speak out against the behavior.) So I’ll contradict what I said above: Yes there was that one night of despair when I even entertained a suicidal thought or two. This is stunning, no? I’m the original come back kid. I’m a bouncer. I’ve got so many ideas. Plans. Skills. You could bottle my aura and sell it for super prozac. But that event was so stark and wretched--and I can’t emphasize this enough!!!!!--IN CONJUNCTION WITH SEVERE EMPHYSEMA’S EXTREMIS that I considered death. “Welcome Home” indeed! Slowly even now, after five and a half weeks, I’m returning to sensateness after numbing out pretty damn thoroughly as a survival mechanism. At the same time, other than the two events as above, I never lost my manners, nor--and this is more important, kept on taking care of myself, my Family, and the Land. My sister who is truly my evil twin (she’s a cop; a Jehovas Witness; a hypochondriac) once asked my from a psych ward: “What do you do, Miranda, when you have no hope?” I said without a moment’s thought: “Why, I just hope for hope!”

Yellowhand:
> We all love you sister some just don’t know how to show it.

Miranda, Raven says: A drink of water and a hug’ll do, mostly! I love you all too!

Miranda, Raven, She Who Paints With Words

From: TimSD13
Subject: A Rainbow for Yellowhand (was Strainbow)
Date: August 26, 1998

Warner S. Bloomberg <SCV...@vval.com> wrote in article<1390669822.79647151.alt.gathering.rainbow@vval.com>...

> Yellowhand wrote:
> > It is unfortunate these lowly few you have encountered.
> > The rainbow, as is life, is what you make of it.

> Miranda, Raven replies: Totally. Totally.

(big ol’ snip)

> Yellowhand:
> > We all love you sister some just don’t know how to show it.
> Miranda, Raven says: A drink of water and a hug’ll do, mostly! I love you all too!
> Miranda, Raven, She Who Paints With Words

Man! Now thta’s why I love this group. Thanks for sharing such an inspirational story.
Paints with words, indeed.
Peace to all,
TimSD13

“No culture can live, if it attempts to be exclusive”.
Mahatma Gandhi

From: yellowhand
Subject: A Rainbow for Yellowhand (was Strainbow)
Date: August 25, 1998

BozHo Miranda, Raven,

My Loving Sister,

Truly in these days of the fourth leg, the days of the sacred pipe, it is good to see strong ones rising from the ashes of the great treaties.

A happy and uplifting response was the most highest hope I could have had.

I knew the prevailing strength existed within you, I just had that feeling.

I too have been weighted down with the downpressers of those who just have never found a focus from within their soul.

I get angry, I sometimes lash out, then when I atone with the universe I pity them.

My pity only goes so deep, however.

I know as a fact people can change, they can find that path to Wakan, I sometimes have to stand strong to the center in order to find the patience needed to offer the energies to my lost brothers or sisters to help them heal.

I am delighted with your astounding insight, many fires I have set next to in the passage of time, it is refreshing when I find those who think deep into the heart of things as do you. Ho!

Tonight I have just finished the constructing of a sacred pipe made of the blood of our elders and the dirt of Mother Earth. Upon it the Four Legged Brother Buffalo is carved and faces the center, as well is acknowledged “red” the direction of north and south and the true path of life as well as the blue and black that speaks clearly of the wretched path of evil and destruction for these thing we must know and accept as the reality no different than the four seasons or even death itself.

It is know wonder you face so many trials and tribulations all brave warriors do, I think this is Wakan Tonka’s way of testing the steal of our soul. It may be true my sister also that nothing happens without reason.

This talk of death so cheaply treated, such a valuable thing.

And even if you kill Miranda, Raven do you think that’s it...that it’s all over?

Not hardly, in fact at that count, it has been passed to me that you would only have to start all over again only to take the same path as before.

I have been to the other side, in returning I know truly pain standing beside unbridled joy.

It may be vision you need, it is obvious that you do have plenty of vision, but I mean that special vision, cried for, after a purification of great spiritual involvement, an exodus per se’.

I invite you to our home in the Ozarks to come and be welcome and find healing. On labor day a special spiritual quest council is beginning on the land as it should be, it would be an uplifting and most healing experience for you I am sure. Many circles will be formed for upliftment and growth as well as learning and healing.

As we prepare for the prophecies to reveal their great winds of change, let us do so, “hand in hand” as a people, as one, as it should be.

With love for you, and the family,
These are the words of,
   Yellowhand

From: JamesA
Subject: A Rainbow for Yellowhand (was Strainbow)
Date: August 25, 1998

From: SCV...@vval.com (Warner S. Bloomberg)

> A big secret is that in one’s creating, though, others will tell you you are wrong or bad to be creating; or that making life anew can’t be done, and, again, that to do so is bad. So the awakeness is to watch this and not take that toxen in.

truer words, never spoken.........Love,James

Howlin’,growlin’,prowlin’ http://www.cataholic.com/james
 all you need is a strong heart and nerves of steel.....


From: JamesA
Subject: A Rainbow (was Strainbow)
Date: August 25, 1998

> Miranda, Raven, She Who Paints With Words
> The whole globe I live on is rainbow land. Is the land. Is sacred! (Sweet, sweet mother!) And every contact with another person is a contact with the god spark, however conscious or unconscious you or they may be. And yes by focusing on the light, the godhood in the Other, krishna consciousness is increased in the world.

truth.... the beautiful truth ..you have come into the heart of truth..... Love,James

Howlin’,growlin’,prowlin’ http://www.cataholic.com/james
all you need is a strong heart and nerves of steel.....


From: Paintword
Subject: Moses
Date: December 5, 1998

My son Moses was sentenced yesterday, Friday, to two years in prison. Minus time served and goodtime, he’ll be out in a year, he tells Warner. (He is not to call or write or come to my home until he can act like a gentleman. And I’m not going near him nor even write to him until he has redeemed himself. I’ve gone to the wall over and over again for him and received no gratitude, no respect from him, nor has he helped himself. Nor, in truth, did he ever ask me to try to help him.) He’s headed for San Quentin for a few months first. His probation officer recommended two years and that’s what he got. All he would have had to do was make one phonecall to this p.o. upon getting kicked out of the program and this same p.o. would have recommended a new program, not prison. I see all of this as biochemic depression. This is all over one half a gram of crank-- (nominally). Also, to me, this is apocalypse. It’s all beyond my worst nightmares.   Miranda, Raven

From: JamesA
Subject: Moses
Date: December 5, 1998

> Also, to me, this is apocalypse. It’s all beyond my worst nightmares.   Miranda, Raven

It truly sucks.....my best wishes for you and Moses......Love,James

They say it’s just a weather balloon...

http://www.cataholic.com/james
all you need is a strong heart and nerves of steel.....

From: LdyCa...@aol.com
Subject: Moses
Date: December 5, 1998

I’m so sorry my heart goes out to you in what must be a very trying time for you.

Lady Cat

From: carla
Subject: Moses
Date: December 5, 1998

Dear Miranda, and also to all other suffering mothers -

My heart goes out to you.

No matter how old they are, we always want to protect them from harm. All we want to know is that they are happy, healthy, and safe.

In my darkest hours as a mother, the book “Siddhartha” helped immensely. I hope you find what you need to ease your pain and your fear.

All you kids of any age out there whose parents don’t know where you are or how you are - no matter what has passed between you - please take a moment to call or write, and let them know you are alive and safe.

Love, Light, and Healing,

Carla

From: Butterfly Bill
Subject: Moses
Date: December 5, 1998

> My son Moses was sentenced yesterday, Friday, to two years in prison. Minus time served and goodtime, he’ll be out in a year, he tells Warner.

It was his karma. It was written. It is according to reason based on observation that this result obtained. The only way for both of you is forward thru it.

> He is not to call or write or come to my home until he can act like a gentleman. And I’m not going near him nor even write to him until he has redeemed himself. I’ve gone to the wall over and over again for him and received no gratitude, no respect from him, nor has he helped himself. Nor, in truth, did he ever ask me to try to help him.)

Right on. Stand firm.

> He’s headed for San Quentin for a few months… …I see all of this as biochemic depression.

I get depressed too, but I’ve learned at least not to do dumb shit when I am. Morality and religion are for not letting depression succeed in taking you to hell. Anybody can learn some of these, or at least some common sense.

> This is all over one half a gram of crank-- (nominally).

And a hellova attitude that surrounded it.

> Also, to me, this is apocalypse. It’s all beyond my worst nightmares.

Reality is far weirder than any fiction we can dream up.

I pray to Krishna to give him courage, to Jesus to help him again find his heart, and to the Devil to be kind as he teaches. Condolence, consolation, and love,

- Butterfly Bill

Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com

From: little big owl
Subject: Moses
Date: December 6, 1998

Pain...@aol.com wrote:

Hi, Mother Raven!

What a karma...

Mother Earth loves her children - equally the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’ - by feeding them, giving shelter AND giving space to them for resolving their karma.

I’m full of compassion with a son that believes to need walls between himself and his mother and a mother, breaking her heart by trying to run her head against them.

> ...(He is not to call or write or come to my home until he can act like a gentleman.

who will teach him?? Them jailbirds???????? I doubt!

> I’m not going near him nor even write to him until he has redeemed himself.

When I was in jail, the most useful things to regain my senses were: a _most_ simple mandala to pray to and a pack of soluble coffee. So, if you want, there is an idea: Pack 1 or 2 items of “spiritual materialism” on wich he can tie his identity before it is broken, add some sweet stuff and I don’t know about the coffee, and send him a Xmas parcel - in my name, if you dot’t want to do it in your’s Here is a message, that you can print out and add, if you don’t want to write yourself:

********************************************************************************
Hi, Moses

Here are some things, I found to be useful
when I was in a similar situation

Xmas, and so...
Fill your heart with light!

your brother mowly!
********************************************************************************

> It’s all beyond my worst nightmares.   Miranda, Raven

Sometimes jail can be a certain recreation!
The worst nightmare to me is to have/to be no friend.

Love, Light, Shelter and inspireing dreams!
  may all feeling beings be happy!
    mowly

email: mo...@gmx.net

From: BoomBdBoom
Subject: Moses
Date: December 7, 1998

In article <e15116d.36692676.alt.gathering.rainbow@aol.com>, Pain...@aol.com writes:

> My son Moses was sentenced yesterday, Friday, to two years in prison

Shit. No surprise, but not welcome news. May you look back on this in twenty years and think; that wasn’t so bad. May something good (learning wise, growth wise, and even love wise) come of it.

(((((((((((((((((Miranda the Raven))))))))))))))))))))

Montana Crystal

From: Randall, Holly-SEA
Subject: Moses
Date: December 7, 1998

> My son Moses was sentenced yesterday, Friday, to two years in prison. Minus time served and goodtime, he’ll be out in a year, he tells Warner. Believe me, M, R - I am sorry to hear this. But I do believe that this is the script he wrote for this incarnation based on karma to finish up and say “good-bye” to and/or lessons asked for and necessary to progress. You understand this concept, I know. Nevertheless, being a mother, too - I understand too well the anguish to us failures or hard times in our kids’ lives can cause!! Ugh.

I have been practicing detachment - it’s getting easier. *with* practice, though. Doesn’t mean I don’t love him to pieces or that I’m not there for him. But I do find it easier to let go of *his* problems and not own them for myself. Whew!

> (He is not to call or write or come to my home until he can act like a gentleman. And I’m not going near him nor even write to him until he has redeemed himself. I’ve gone to the wall over and over again for him and received no gratitude, no respect from him, nor has he helped himself. Nor, in truth, did he ever ask me to try to help him.)

Good for you! Walk through your fears - it’s scary when we draw these lines - at least for me it has been. Until I could see so clearly how my acceptance of my son while he was behaving in certain unhealthy and sad ways was only enabling him to continue with these less than sober, wise and gentle behaviors and attitudes. Finally, in what appeared to be a near breakdown, my son suddenly took off for relatives back on the res in South Dakota. Something snapped and his desire to be sober and living as fully as he knows he deserves sent him off in absolute desperation. I’m happy to say that he has now not had a drink in over 2 months!! And what a difference in his attitude, his thinking, his actions, his language. But before this, I had to finally say - “Not in my house.” I had to set my boundaries and tell him that I deserved better and remain firm. Scary!!!! So, I applaud you, Miranda, Raven when I see you setting limits and drawing the line. You, go!

> He’s headed for San Quentin for a few months first. His probation officer recommended two years and that’s what he got. All he would have had to do was make one phonecall to this p.o. upon getting kicked out of the program and this same p.o. would have recommended a new program, not prison.

Possibly, this is just something that he, as his spirit, knew he has to experience. Something that is beyond our understanding... Or, could be nothing more than a consequence of walking by his window of opportunity and now his path will simply veer off in another direction... ?

> I see all of this as biochemic depression.

Ya. But there are those that in midst of their depressions choose help. choose treatment (in whatever shape or form). Often hard to know, however, where real depression ends and self-pity or manipulation or stubborness or laziness begins... However, again - your “job” is finished. Love him unconditionally but - from a distance while he figures things out himself and takes these adult steps. Just my opinion, of course!

> This is all over one half a gram of crank-- (nominally).

In my mind, crank is a nasty drug with nasty karma...

> Also, to me, this is apocalypse.

To you this is.

> It’s all beyond my worst nightmares.   Miranda, Raven This, I know to be true, Miranda, Raven and I’d like to just wrap my arms around and let you safely let it all out. Cry, rant, stomp, and then sleep with your head on my shoulder. My heart surely goes out to you. Hell, it’s tough being parents.

Love ya, and sending light to you
spring

From: Randall, Holly-SEA
Subject: Moses
Date: December 7, 1998

> Dear Miranda, and also to all other suffering mothers -
> My heart goes out to you.

Thanks, Carla - your words were well received!! Appreciated them. And I’m glad you thought to remind “the kids” to write or call home!!

Love,
spring

From: Paintword
Subject: Moses
Date: December 8, 1998

> Shit. No surprise, but not welcome news. May you look back on this in twenty years and think; that wasn’t so bad. May something good (learning wise, growth wise, and even love wise) come of it.

I believe it is all good. I believe the universe is ultimately good/god/love/om. Bad evil are interim mechanisms. And the sorrow and pain in the meantime only shreds me to tatters and wrings tears out of my bones. Thank you agr family, for all your hugs and love and wise words and family tears. Nothing more! That’s life! It is a communal pool, well of sorrow these tears come from. i love you ((((((((((Montana Crystal.))))))))))) I don’t think it’s so bad now. It is only the end of the world-- that always means the end of delusions, however honey tasting and warm and cuddly... As Paul Simon said: “Who am I to blow against the wind?” M the R

From: BoomBdBoom
Subject: Moses
Date: December 9, 1998

In article <c13392c5.366d5bdf.alt.gathering.rainbow@aol.com>, Pain...@aol.com writes:

Quoting myself:

> May you look back on this in twenty years and think; that wasn’t so bad. May something good (learning wise, growth wise, and even love wise) come of it.

To him as well as to you, M the R. I love to see you rise above it. May I quote your “wring tears from my bones”? Such wonderful wordsmithy.

Montana Crystal

From: Paintword
Subject: Moses
Date: December 9, 1998

Yup! We be playin’ wid da big boys now! I Love You, Butterfly Bill. Miranda, Raven, She Who Says: Krishna Krishna, Rama, Rama!


From: Rodeo Red
Subject: Moses Crosses the Desert
Date: December 5, 1998

Most people stay near their own kind, even if they all travel around as a group. But others, for one reason or another, choose to seek other civilizations.

Some even change their minds a number of times. Moses, for example, was exiled and crossed the desert, where he found and joined up with a shepherd. Then he came into contact with another exile, an escaped convict. After much prodding, Moses became convinced that he could free his own people, and went back home.

Nowadays it is even harder to leave your people behind. No matter where you go, you might see your homeland on T.V., or the people back home might see you. No matter where you go, there’s always going to be some police, and they are going to want to see your papers, and if they so choose, they can trace your credit cards etc. etc. etc.

Anonamous travel under these circumstances is out of the question for most people. Even if you get exiled to another country, some of your old life would probably find its way to you, just as it did with Moses.

If you’re wondering why any one would ever want to travel anonamously, with alot of privacy, imagine if Moses had been under closer survailance, and that the Pharohs knew where Moses was, what he said, and who went to visit him. Imagine if the Egyptians knew he had been plotting with an escaped convict to free the Hebrews. His plan to lead his people to freedom would have been worthless, and probably fatal.

With mass communication, and instant news, your life could become an open book at any time. And it is not always possible to find a jury of peers who haven’t already made up their minds about what’s in that book.

There are millions of people who are traveling at this moment, far from home, trying to remain anonomous, not by choice, but by neccesity. Some of these people are criminals and have served notice on their society that they are never going to be peacefull. Some were forced to leave, and some went voluntarily, in search of greener pastures. Others are completely innocent of any wrongdoing, but were falsley accused of some crime for political reasons.

And they saw the jury was rigged and did the only sensible thing: run.

Some intend to return, and others to disapear into the wilderness, or some other society, or to travel forever from world to world. Some, like Moses, have changed their minds a number of times. Changed their minds not only about where to go or stay, but who is a criminal and who is a hero.

What also changes, not only in the minds of the endless travelers, but also in the most stable people, is their opinion of who should be under survailance.

Rodeo Red

From: Paintword
Subject: Moses Crosses the Desert
Date: December 9, 1998

Rodeo Red, you blow my mind most beautifully. Mowly asked who will teach Moses. It is more--as you remind me, Red, that my son goes about teaching. Who am I to judge where? What? How? As Butterfly Bill has reminded me here severally over the months, Moses is through me; he and I are not the same being and our karma is separate. Bless the Rainbow Family of Living Light! Love and Illumination, Miranda, Raven, She Who Says, Thank you, Rodeo Red, For This Freshened Dream. Identity indeed! It’s getting hard to be someone but it all works out...

From: Rodeo Red
Subject: Moses Crosses the Desert
Date: December 10, 1998

Pain...@aol.com wrote:

> Rodeo Red, you blow my mind most beautifully.

Same to you buddy !!!


From: WSB3ATTYCA
Subject: Moses (reply to Mowly)
Date: December 10, 1998

I’ll answer Mowly’s letter about Moses point by point:

Mowly:
> Hi, Mother Raven! What a karma... Mother Earth loves her children - equally the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’ - by feeding them, giving shelter AND giving space to them for resolving their karma.

M,R: I take humbrage at the words ‘good’ and ‘bad’. I do not believe in these concepts, though I may occasionally use these words. I see by your surrounding them with quotation marks that you are using them suggestively rather than in any absolutist way. Nevertheless by using them you are suggesting a continuum of relative merit upon which I infer you mean--more or less-- that my so is ‘bad’, or in that neighborhood or direction. “Tis not so. This has nothing to do with it.

Mowly:
> I’m full of compassion with a son that believes to need walls between himself and his mother and a mother, breaking her heart by trying to run her head against them.

M,R: Thank you for the compassion. But jeezzz... My son has gone to jail to get away from me? Wow! maybe I should just bash my head out on them brick walls as you suggest if that is so! Besides, he didn’t live with me or anything. This isn’t a Victorian novel or the movie Psycho or something. His incrceration(s) have nothing to do with me --except they make me wretched as to the waste this young man has made of his life. I was there. I know how lovingly and richly he was brought up. I know what his abilities and opportunities are. They are great. He has had no modelling or precedents in his life for jail/prison.

After quoting me, M,R:, thus
> > He is not to call or write or come to my home until he can act like a gentleman.

Mowly writes:
> who will teach him?? Them jailbirds???????? I doubt!

M,R: Well, that’s just not up to me. I’ve taught him as I could for twenty-two years. Grownups pick their own teachers. It’s called free will. Gravity/god are the only teachers, anyway.

(SNIP)

Mowley:
> When I was in jail, the most useful things to regain my senses were: a _most_ simple mandala to pray to and a pack of soluble coffee. So, if you want, there is an idea: Pack 1 or 2 items of “spiritual materialism” on wich he can tie his identity before it is broken, add some sweet stuff and I don’t know about the coffee, and send him a Xmas parcel - in my name, if you dot’t want to do it in your’s Here is a message, that you can print out and add, if you don’t want to write yourself:

M,R: Tell you what Mowly, a) this is a Jewish man we’re talking about who has no truck with Christmas, b) you want to write him? you or anyone is welcomed to do so as far as I’m concerned: Moses Joel Yohalem; Santa Cruz County Jail; Santa Cruz, Ca; Please Forward c) I don’t care to hear anymore about being in jail. If I were really curious, I’d get myself busted and find out first hand what this disgusting practice and habitat is about. d) I know more about it than I ever wanted to know. And Moses knows a lot about it having been there ten times before. But he’s going to PRISON. SAN QUENTIN. That’s where they keep death row, just to make the point of the seriousness here.

Mowly:
> Sometimes jail can be a certain recreation! The worst nightmare to me is to have/to be no friend.

M,R: Moses has lots of friends. A lot of them are in jail with him. He’s the beloved leader of a whole syndicate.

Look, dear Mowly, I understand the motives of your post are very loving. But you very much miss all the subtler points. I’ve been posting here from time to time about my son and my efforts on his behalf for a year. This guy has had me on the ropes for almost ten years with his rage aholism and verbal and even physical abuse, extreme drug use and dangerous adventurism. I have drawn a line and I will not step over it. This is to protect myself. I can no longer sacrifice myself to or for him. I have a life with more to do and be than simply this guy’s mother.

Moses is not a child. He has made decisions over and over again to get where he is. He is not going to prison because of some whimsy of the system; it wasn’t some random chance by which he got caught. He is exactly where he wants to be. He had wonderful choices he could have made and wouldn’t have had to even give up the drugs he likes! I do not feel sorry for him.
Miranda, Raven

From: little big owl
Subject: Moses (reply to Mowly)
Date: December 11, 1998

Dear Miranda,Raven!

May a seraph come, I pray, and change theese dots into words that make you feel easy!:

“..... ........ ...... .. ..... ....... ....... ... ....... ....
.... ...... .. ........ . ... ....... ...... ... . ... ..... ......
.... ............ ....... .. .......... ... ....... .. ... ........
....... ...... .. .. ........ .. .... ... ......... ...... ..
........... ....... .... ... ..... . ............ .. .......! ....
......... ....... . .......... ... ......... .. ......... .. ... .
..... ... ..... .......... ..............., ........., .......,
......... .......... . ........ .... ... ...... .....................
....... ....... ....... ... . ........... ......... . ...... ... .
........... ................. .. ...... .. .. . .... .. .... ....??
...... .... .. ....... .. ...... ... ..... . ........ . ...... .......
..... ....... . . ........ .. ... ..... ... ... ........ ..... ......=
.......... . ......... ... .... ... ...... .......... . ... ....
........... ... ..... ... ..... ....... ........ .. .... ..... ...
........ . ...... ........ .... ..... .”

*end of message*

...in case you want to read my own clumsy words...

Thank you for your reply, it teaches me alot! It is not at all easy for me now to respond (I’m sitting here already for an hour trying), but I’ll do my best: Your posting touched me and I replied spontaneously what went thru my mind. I did not regard my lack of information - which I should have done, because my reply came out unsensitive and I stepped on your toes, which I didn’t mean to. Please forgive me

Warner S. Bloomberg wrote:

> I’ll answer Mowly’s letter about Moses point by point:
> ... Mother Earth loves her children - equally the ‘good’ and the ‘bad’...

Quotation marks ment _just_: Let us refrain from judgeing, like Mother Earth does.

[...]

> of relative merit upon which I infer you mean--more or less-- that my so is ‘bad’, or in that neighborhood or direction. “Tis not so. This has nothing to do with it.

NONONONO, this is NOT!!!!!

> Mowly:
> > I’m full of compassion with a son that believes to need walls between himself and his mother and a mother, breaking her heart by trying to run her head against them.
> M,R: Thank you for the compassion. But jeezzz... My son has gone to jail to get away from me? Wow! maybe I should just bash my head out on them brick walls as you suggest if that is so! Besides, he didn’t live with me or anything. This isn’t a Victorian novel or the movie Psycho or something. His incrceration(s) have nothing to do with me --except they make me wretched as to the waste this young man has made of his life. I was there. I know how lovingly and richly he was brought up. I know what his abilities and opportunities are. They are great. He has had no modelling or precedents in his life for jail/prison.

This was a thought, trying to figure out a possible cause of the effect. If it isn’t, it isn’t, but somehow I can’t get rid of the feeling, it might be a point.

> After quoting me, M,R:, thus:
> > He is not to call or write or come to my home until he can act like a gentleman.”
> Mowly writes:
> > who will teach him?? Them jailbirds???????? I doubt!
> M,R: Well, that’s just not up to me. I’ve taught him as I could for twenty-two years. Grownups pick their own teachers. It’s called free will. Gravity/god are the only teachers, anyway.

I’m very shure he *can* act like a gentleman. I should have written: who will make him do so

I’m very shure you did the best you could, also, tho it might sound awkward,

I’m very shure hee did the best hee could.

[...]

> But he’s going to PRISON. SAN QUENTIN. That’s where they keep death row, just to make the point of the seriousness here.

Do they say ‘jail’ for this countryside thing, where the sheriff puts in the people, till they’re sober in the morning? My dictionary did’nt tell me (I’m Austrian)

> M,R: Moses has lots of friends. A lot of them are in jail with him. He’s the beloved leader of a whole syndicate
> Look, dear Mowly, I understand the motives of your post are very loving. But you very much miss all the subtler points. I’ve been posting here from time to time about my son and my efforts on his behalf for a year. This guy has had me on the ropes for almost ten years with his rage aholism and verbal and even physical abuse, extreme drug use and dangerous adventurism.

I see.

> have drawn a line and I will not step over it. This is to protect myself. I can no longer sacrifice myself to or for him. I have a life with more to do and be than simply this guy’s mother.
> Moses is not a child. He has made decisions over and over again to get where he is. He is not going to prison because of some whimsy of the system; it wasn’t some random chance by which he got caught. He is exactly where he wants to be. He had wonderful choices he could have made and wouldn’t have had to even give up the drugs he likes! I do not feel sorry for him.

Slowly getting to know you a little bit, I do hope, you feel better now, also about my expressions.

You’ve been seen by a hug-patrol!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Miranda, Raven}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

may all feeling beings be happy!

mowly

He, who shouts like a corporal
   yells like a truck driver
  and cries like a baby when he has hurt someone

My heart is my master.

 

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